Baby Boot Camp
by sj1
Summary: This story takes place in Season 7. In my fanfic Monica is pregnant and Rachel isn't.


  
**A FRIENDS Season 8 Alternate Fanfic**   
**TOW: Baby Boot Camp**   
**Written By: SJ Wong**

* * *

Rating: G 

Well Season 8 is here and Rachel is pregnant but Monica isn't. This story is for all the Chandler and Monica Fans who wanted a "Bing baby" before the show ends its run. This story takes place in the beginning of Season 8. In my story, Monica and Chandler are married and she is 4 and a half months pregnant. Rachel and Phoebe are not. I wrote this fanfic, in July, with very few responses, so I rewrote it with some input from JJAKS (Thanks). I hope this fanfic will get a better reception this time.   


* * *

SCENE: Chandler and Monica's Apartment - Monica is as usual, by the stove, stirring something in a pot. Chandler comes in the door. He has just gotten off work so he is in his suit and tie. He puts his briefcase down on the counter open his arms wide and gives Monica a big smile.   
CHANDLER: You're husband's home, come and give him a kiss. (Monica puts down the spoon, turns around and smiles at Chandler. She walks up and puts her arms around him and gives her a sweet kiss.)   
MONICA: Are you going to do this every evening?   
CHANDLER: Do what?   
MONICA: You know, come in and say "You're husband's home." You've been saying it for the last four months.   
CHANDLER: You don't like the word husband. How about hubby, your old man, or better yet lord and master? (He says this with a mischievous grin.)   
MONICA: Let's stick with husband.   
CHANDLER: I can't help it. I like the idea that we're married. That, I'm your husband. And that, you're my wife. It's strange, I had such a fear of marriage, but now that we are, I like it. I like it a lot. (pause and think) And, the reason is you, the best wife ever.   
MONICA: And that's why I married you. (Chandler gives her a puzzled look.) You're so good for my ego. (Monica gives Chandler a quick kiss on the cheek. She walks back to the stove. Chandler check the mail on the table.) I saw something really cute, today.   
CHANDLER: Have you spend the day, looking at our wedding album, again?   
MONICA (embarrassed): Well, just for a minute (Chandler gives her a knowing look.) I can't help it, we look darn good that day (pause, looks off dreamily, wake herself) but that's not it. It was something I saw on TV.   
CHANDLER: That's funny, I haven't done any television appearances, recently? (Monica gives him an annoyed look.) Okay, so what did you see that was cuter than me?   
MONICA: There was this show with all these babies. They were doing a segment called "Baby Boot Camp".   
CHANDLER (teasing): Our baby isn't born yet and you want to send him (correct himself) or her, off to camp already. How is that going to work? Aren't you two, a package deal?(Monica gives him a look. Chandler tries to placate Monica.) So honey, what is this Baby Boot Camp? (He ask with fake enthusiasm.)   
MONICA: Actually, it's a class for fathers-to-be. Fathers learns the basics on how to take care of a newborn. And, guess what? They happen to have a class this weekend and I signed you up.   
CHANDLER: But Mon, (trying to find an excuse to get out of it, he walks over to the clipboard that is attached to the refrigerator. He takes it off the hook and gives it a quick look.) I'm scheduled to paint the baby's room this weekend. This will totally screw up your schedule.   
MONICA: Then I'll have to do it.   
CHANDLER: No, you will not! Paint fumes are bad for the baby!   
MONICA: I can wear a face mask.   
CHANDLER: You are not doing it!   
MONICA (thinking): Okay, I'll get Phoebe and Rachel to do it. (Chandler gives her a funny look.) They'll do it (with doubt in her voice).   
CHANDLER: I guess, I could do it after work...or I could NOT GO to this class.   
MONICA: Oh Chandler, please go (pause) this way, I won't worry when I leave you alone with the baby. (Chandler starts getting an anxiety attack, pulling on his tie, trying to breathes. Monica doesn't see this, her head is turned toward the stove.)   
CHANDLER (whispering but upset): ALONE...with the baby?????!!!!!   


* * *

SCENE: Central Perk - Chandler is sitting on the sofa looking a little dazed. Ross and Joey walks over.   
ROSS: Hey Chan... (Chandler is startled.)   
JOEY: Whoa man, it's only us. (They both sit down, one, on each side of him.)   
CHANDLER: Sorry, guys, I guess I was just thinking about something. (He picks up his coffee and there is a slight shaking in his hand. Ross helps him put the coffee cup back on the table.)   
ROSS: What's wrong man? Why the shakes? Is Monica and the baby, okay?   
CHANDLER: Yeah, they're fine. (pause) For NOW.   
JOEY: What do you mean by that?   
CHANDLER: It's Monica, she plans to leave me ALONE with the baby. Me!   
ROSS: Yeah, so?   
CHANDLER: You know, me, Chandler! The guy who swallowed an action figure, the guy who loses a baby on a bus.   
JOEY: Hey man, We both did that. (Ross give Joey a disgusted look.)   
CHANDLER: I'll probably do something stupid, like drop him or lose her. Then, Monica will end up hating me and she'll leave me.   
ROSS: No you won't and no she won't. Have you talked to Monica about this?   
CHANDLER: Monica, wants me to take a class in child care.   
ROSS: That sounds like a good idea.   
CHANDLER: I don't know if I'm ready for all this...I mean...I'm going to be a father...baby...diaper...responsibilities....I'll have to grow up...(with each word Chandler is getting more and more nervous)   
ROSS: Look man, it's no problem. This class will do you good. You can take it one step at a time. In fact, Joey and I will go with you. (Joey gives Ross a funny look. Ross gives Joey a look, "play along with me".) I'm an expert at this baby stuff. I can coach you. And, Joey here, can use it (pause) in case he ever has to, to (pause, come up with an idea) play a father in a movie or something. Right, Joey? (Ross gives him the eye. Joey responses reluctantly)   
JOEY: Yeah, no problem. But there better not be anything gross! (Chandler and Ross looks at him.) We're talking babies here, either their spitting or leaking.   
ROSS: Most likely, they'll give us dolls to practice on.   
JOEY: Yeah, dolls that will be spitting or leaking!   


* * *

SCENE: Joey and Rachel's Apartment - Phoebe and Rachel are sitting in front of the TV, playing video games. They are really into it, killing things left and right. You can hear explosion every few seconds. With enthusiastic wooo hooo from both girls. Monica comes in the door with a smile on her face.   
MONICA (enthusiastically): Hey, guys! What cha doing?   
PHOEBE (not taking their eyes off the screen.): We're trying to save the earth from total annihilation.   
RACHEL: Be quiet Mon, this is a delicate maneuver. (Next you hear a loud explosion coming from the TV. Both girls put down their controls, totally frustrated.)   
RACHEL: Darn, we were so close.   
PHOEBE: Yeah, we were kicking butts out there!   
MONICA: Sorry guys. Didn't mean to distract you. (As if just coming up with an idea.) Hey, let me make it up to you, what are you guys doing this Saturday?   
RACHEL: I wish I could say, I've got a hot date, but I can't.   
PHOEBE: Yeah, where are all the cute attractive guys when you need them?   
MONICA: Okay then. This Saturday I'll get rid of Chandler and we'll have a girl's luncheon, at my place. (Monica edge toward the door, not wanting to give them a chance to ask questions.) And, I'll think of some fun art and craft activity afterward, so leave the whole afternoon open. (Monica leaves closing the door behind her.)   
RACHEL: So what do you think Monica is up to?   
PHOEBE: It sounds like a set-up.   
RACHEL: Darn, why wasn't I blessed with a faster brain. Ohhh, we can tell her something came up.   
PHOEBE: I don't know, I think we better go. (Rachel gives Phoebe a puzzled look.) I'm scared of her. (After a pause, Rachel respond.)   
RACHEL (meekly): Me too.   


* * *

SCENE: In a school gymnasium - There are about 11 men in the room, including the guys. There are four rows of chairs. The guys are sitting in the back row with Chandler sitting between Ross and Joey. There are two male instructors at the front of the class. Chandler is looking uncomfortable, so Ross tries to distract him.   
ROSS: Don't worry man, this is going to be a piece of cake.   
CHANDLER: Yeah and I'll be the first guy to flunk diapering.   
ROSS: You'll do fine. Hey, this will be fun. We could play diaper basketball after class. (Chandler gives Ross a weird look.)   
CHANDLER: I don't even want to know how that's played.   
JOEY: Diapers are gross. I'm not touching anything gross!   
ROSS: What can be gross? This is a training class. The only thing dolls discharge is water.   
JOEY: One can only hope.   
CHANDLER: Quiet you guys, the class is starting.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Welcome gentlemen to Baby boot camp. I am your instructor Jack and this is my assistance Jill.   
CHANDLER (whisper to Ross): Jack and Jill? Is this Mother Goose University?   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: You are here to learn how to take care of a baby. Here in Baby boot camp, you will get a crash course in everything. By the end of today you will be expert fathers. And in this class, we will be working with real babies, so that you will know what you will be up against.(Joey and Chandler stands up. Ross pulls Chandler back into his seat who pulls Joey down with him. The instructors notice their movement.)   
CHANDLER: Sorry, reflex action.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Is there a problem gentlemen? (Ross stands up.)   
ROSS: My friends here are just a little nervous. First baby and everything, but don't worry I'm a pro at this, I'll keep an eye on these two for you. In fact, I too, can help with the class. I already have one son and he came out great. (Ross is about to go on but the instructor interrupts him.)   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Your friends are lucky to have your support. Now please sit down and we'll get started. (Ross smiles and sits down.) As I was saying gentlemen, no need to worry we'll be here to guide you. (whisper to the other instructor): Keep an eye on that one (pointing to Ross), he thinks he's an expert. (The other instructor nod back at him.)   


* * *

SCENE: Chandler and Monica's Apartment - Monica is putting the finishing touches to a nice lunch. She puts on a face mask and walks over to the baby's room to tell the girls it's time to take a break for lunch. She opens the door. The camera moves to Phoebe and Rachel sitting, on the floor, in the middle of the room. Nothing has been done.   
RACHEL: For your skin color, I would go with flower prints, and you should definitely try short hair. It would look so cute on you.   
PHOEBE: Wow, thanks for the input.   
MONICA: Guuyzys! Whuzjt thuez(pause) yue (Monica is talking, but because of the mask hers words are garbled.)   
PHOEBE: Monica. Why are you wearing that thing? (Pointing to the mask.)   
MONICA: Chondler wontd me war ut.   
PHOEBE: Oh he is so sweet.   
MONICA: Ho awlwoy warry abot ma al tha boby?   
PHOEBE: You are so lucky to have him. (Monica is upset that the girls haven't even started painting.)   
MONICA: Whot ore yu goils ding? Yosudfs hoven eff storted....   
PHOEBE: Monica, don't talk like that! The baby might hear you!   
MONICA (frustrated) : I dodnt soy ...   
PHOEBE: Such language is totally unacceptable!(Monica gets frustrated and leaves the room) I guess, we should start painting.   
RACHEL: What did she say?   
PHOEBE: Who knows? I just said that stuff to get rid of her.   


* * *

SCENE: In the school gymnasium - The boys are still sitting on the back row of the set of chairs. The camera is on the boys and you can hear the instructor talking.   
JACK: The first topic on our agenda is Feeding.   
JOEY (whisper to Chandler): It's nap time.   
JACK: In today enlighten world, more women are choosing to breast feed.   
JOEY (become alert): And maybe not. (Ross raise his hand. Jack points to him and Ross stands up.)   
ROSS: Is it safe to drink? (Instructor looks puzzled.) You know the breast milk? (Instructor looks more puzzled.) You know for adults.   
JACK: Yes it is, but I think the baby needs it more than you do. (There is a reaction of light laughter in the room.)   
ROSS(embarrassed) : Never mind. (He sits back down.)   
CHANDLER: I could have told you that.   
JACK: Now where were we? oh yes breast feeding. (Joey snickers. Chandler gives Joey a dirty look. Joey look sheepish.) Women pretty much take care of this job. But you can be a supportive partner and bring her the baby, especially at night feeding.   
JOEY (whisper to Chandler): Is Monica doing that? (Chandler nods and notice Joey getting a big smile on his face.)   
CHANDLER: Don't go there man.   
JOEY: Go where??? With all this talk about milk, I'm getting an urge for a milkshake. (Chandler is disgusted by this.)   


* * *

SCENE: In the school gymnasium - The boys are at one long table. Chandler is in the middle, Ross is to his left and Joey is to his right. They each have a baby in front of them. The instructors are in the front of the class.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Now we will be learning how to burp the baby. (He is demonstrating with a real baby.) Place a clean towel on your shoulder. Now pick up the baby with both hand, making sure to support the head and gently place him on your shoulder. Now rub gently on his back. (Ross raises his hand.)   
ROSS: Don't you mean pat him?   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: I guess you could if you do it gently. Most men are to forceful to do it that way.   
ROSS (talking to Chandler and Joey): I did it that way with Ben and he was fine with it.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Now gentlemen, you try it. (Ross picks up his baby and starts patting him with no response. Chandler cautiously picks up his baby and put him gently on his shoulder and rubs his back getting a natural burp from the baby. He smiles at his success. after a few seconds, Joey does the same thing but get an adult male burp out of his baby. Chandler and Joey gives each other a gentle hi-five with their free hand. Ross is still trying to get a burp from his baby using the patting method.)   
ROSS: It's the baby, I never had any trouble with Ben. (Chandler and Joey are behind Ross when the baby finally burps.) See, I did it, he burped! (Chandler and Joey gets this disgusted look on their faces. The baby has thrown up all over Ross's back)   
JOEY: That's not the only thing you got him to do.   


* * *

SCENE: The Nursery - Rachel is upset.   
RACHEL: I don't want to paint!   
PHOEBE: The secret to doing a nasty job, is to make it fun.   
RACHEL: So how do we make this fun?   
PHOEBE: Well, (pause) like (pause) when I have to massage an ugly client.   
RACHEL: Yeah? What do you do with that?   
PHOEBE: I close my eyes and pretend it's someone hot! (pause) like (pause) Anthony Hopkins.   
RACHEL (confused): Anthony Hopkins???   
PHOEBE: Yeah, Hannibal the cannibal. He is so HOT! (Rachel gives Phoebe a weird look.)   
RACHEL: Ummm! Phoebe, you do know what a cannibal is?   
PHOEBE: Sure, I do, what's the point?   
RACHEL: You're a vegetarian. Cannibal are the worst of meat eaters.   
PHOEBE: Yeah, but they eat people. (Phoebe says this as if it explain everything. Rachel looks puzzled.) You know, less people to eat the defenseless animals. (Rachel doesn't want to pursue this, so she changes the subject.)   
RACHEL: So, this closing your eyes stuff, really works?   
PHOEBE: Yeah, as long as they don't have any strange growth on their body. (Rachel shakes her shoulder disgusted by the thought.)   


* * *

SCENE: In the school gymnasium - The boys are at one long table. Chandler is in the middle, Ross is to his left and Joey is to his right. They each have a baby in front of them. The instructor is in the front of the class.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: And remember, if you have a girl, you must remember to wipe from front to back to avoid bladder infection. (Joey turns to Chandler.)   
JOEY: Isn't that getting a little TOO personal?   
CHANDLER: It's either get personal or let them get a bad case of diaper rash.   
INSTRUCTOR JACK: Now, you guys try it. (Ross slowly takes the diaper off and is relieved. He smiles and says.)   
ROSS: It's a boy. (Chandler does the same thing and smile.)   
CHANDLER: I'm use to dealing with this, but not this, whoa, what did this kid eat? (Chandler turns around, takes in a big breath, turns back holding his breath, and changes the baby quickly. Joey looks at his baby reluctantly then decide to just do it.)   
JOEY (annoyed): Darn, I've got a girl. Hey, let's switch. (Joey comes up with an idea and looks at Chandler.) Monica might have a girl.   
CHANDLER (forcefully): Monica is going to have a boy.(reinforcing it) She is. Anyway Joey, you should be use to girls, you have 7 sisters.   
JOEY(mad): They're my sisters! Don't you go there! (Chandler takes his baby and walks over to the other side of Ross.)   


* * *

SCENE: Chandler and Monica's apartment - Monica is sitting on the sofa crocheting a baby blanket. She decides to get up and check on the girls. She walks over to the door trying to decide rather to open it or not. The scene changes to the room. On the wall is a bunch of scribbles and doodles. The girls had doodled "Rachel Pitt", "Rachel Cruise", "Rachel Willis", "Phoebe Hopkins" among other things. Phoebe and Rachel have paintbrushes in their hands.)   
PHOEBE: Hey Rach, Brad Pitts's married.   
RACHEL: Oh that won't last long, she's too much of a bubble head.   
PHOEBE: I don't know, they seem really in love.   
RACHEL: Yeah, you're right. (She crosses out the name. All of a sudden, they hear...)   
MONICA: You should try, "Rachel Clooney" or "Rachel Afleck", they're still available. (Both girls, looks guiltily at Monica, who is leaning against the door.)   
PHOEBE (whisper to Rachel): Busted.   


* * *

SCENE: In the school gymnasium - Chandler and Joey are both playing with their practice baby.   
JOEY: Goochi Goochi goo. (The baby laughs.)   
CHANDLER: So the boy baby turns to the girl baby and says "So how long have you been tee-thing?". (The baby starts crying. Chandler picks the baby up and starting comforting him.) Come on, that was one of my best baby joke. (The baby whimpers.)   
JOEY: I didn't know babies could be this much fun. (Chandler is smiling and nodding to Joey.)   
CHANDLER: Yeah, I'm starting to look forward to being a daddy.   
JOEY: You're a pretty lucky man. You get to marry the women you love and now she's having your baby. I mean, what are the chances, you being Chandler and everything? (Chandler doesn't get upset knowing Joey didn't mean anything by it.)   
CHANDLER: Yeah being Chandler pretty much raises the odds. (Chandler pauses and smiles as he remember something.) And now I don't have to buy a snake.   
JOEY (shivers): Buy a snake??? Ewwww, why would you do that? (Joey has a fear of snakes.)   
CHANDLER: Remember when Heckle died and I thought I would end up alone. I was going to be "Crazy Snake Man".   
JOEY (uncomfortable): No,no, not snakes! I would pick something a little more friendly. You know, pick something like (Joey is thinking) penguins? You could be "Crazy Penguin Man" or better yet get a couple more ducks and be "Crazy ...   
CHANDLER (changing the subject): I wonder where Ross went? (They look around the room and notice that Ross is over with Jack and Jill. They're having a heated discussion. Ross is very animated. It ends with Jack showing Ross the door out.)   
JOEY: I wonder what that's about?   
CHANDLER: Knowing Ross, I would say nothing important.   


* * *

SCENE: The Bing's Future Nursery - Phoebe and Rachel are standing in the middle of the room, looking at the one wall they finished painting. They both have a little bit of paint on their face, hair and clothes.   
RACHEL (proudly): We did it! and I must say I did a good job.   
PHOEBE: Don't you mean us?   
RACHEL: Oh yeah, you did a good job on that trim. (Phoebe looks annoyed.)   
PHOEBE: Yes, you did one whole wall. (Phoebe looks at her watch) And it just took you three and a half hours.   
RACHEL: Yes, but it looks great. The baby is going to love it. (Phoebe gets this mischievous look on her face.)   
PHOEBE: Oh, but you missed a spot. (Rachel looks all over the wall.)   
RACHEL: Where? I don't see it. (Phoebe picks up a paint brush.)   
PHOEBE: Right here. (Phoebe paints an "X" across Rachel's shirt. Rachel looks down at her shirt and gets all upset. Phoebe giggles.)   
RACHEL: Phoebe! This was one of my favorite shirts.   
PHOEBE: Yes, and that is why you decided to wear it to paint a room. (Rachel attitude suddenly changes, to one of mischief, which she hides from Phoebe.)   
RACHEL: You're right, silly me, it was already ruined. (pause) Well, I guess we better get started on the other three walls.   
PHOEBE: Yes, it's almost time for Monica's hourly check-in. (While Phoebe wasn't watching Rachel puts her hand in the paint. Phoebe turns around and she hides her hand and try to look innocent. Phoebe turns to the wall to paint. Rachel comes up behind her and pats her on the back. Now there is a handspring on Phoebe's back.)   
RACHEL: Phoebe can you do the window? You're a better painter than I am.   
PHOEBE: Sure. (Phoebe moves over to the window. Rachel has a grin of satisfaction. The camera moves to Phoebe who have a devilish look on her face.)   


* * *

SCENE: Monica's and Chandler's Apartment - Monica is coming in the front door with two guys. One of them is Gary from upstairs (TOW 709: All the Candy).   
MONICA: This is great that you guys are doing this.   
GARY: No problem. Lead us to the room. (Monica opens the nursery door.)   
MONICA: Hey girls, I got replaceme... (Monica loses her voice after seeing the girls and the room.) (Camera moves to Phoebe and Rachel. Rachel has paint, polka dotted on her face, she has streaks of paint on her shirt and pant legs, both of her hand our covered with paint. Phoebe has her back toward them, she has a clump of paint in her hair and a big paint stain on her tushy. Seeing the guys, she turns around and they both try to look attractive.)   
RACHEL: Hi there.   
PHOEBE: How you doin?   


* * *

SCENE: In the school gymnasium. Joey is playing peek-a-boo with a baby (the baby is giggling and smiling). Chandler taps Joey on the shoulder.   
CHANDLER: Joey the class is over. It's time to put the baby back in the crib.   
JOEY: But, she's doesn't want to go!   
CHANDLER: The baby was just to practice on, you don't get to keep her.   
JOEY (hugging the baby): But, we bonded. She likes me. Look she's smiling at me. She doesn't want me to leave her.   
CHANDLER: Joey put the baby back.   
JOEY: It's easy for you to say, you're getting your own in five months.   
CHANDLER: You don't want to get in trouble with Jack and Jill, (Joey gives him an "I don't care look.") You're right, that doesn't sound very threatening. (pause) The parents are going to come back any minute and they're going to want their baby back. (Joey ignore him and continue playing with the baby. Chandler thinks for a moment and comes up with an idea.) I'm getting hungry. You know what sound real good right now, a meatball sandwich (Joey perks up). Yep that's what I feel like having right now. You know I think I will. (Chandler starts to walks off. Joey looks at the baby and then at Chandler, not knowing what to do, he looks like it was a life and death decision. He finally puts the baby back in the crib, gives her a kiss on the forehead lovingly, and goes after Chandler.)   
JOEY: Hey wait for me!   


* * *

SCENE: Central Perk - Monica is sitting in the center of the sofa. Rachel is sitting at the table on the left. Phoebe is sitting on the chair on the right. and the guys comes in the door. (Monica moves over and Chandler sits next to her. Joey sits to his right and Ross is sitting on the arm of the sofa. He is very solemn.)   
MONICA: So how did it go?   
CHANDLER: I did good! I even, got a diploma! (Smiling, he pulls out his diploma.)   
MONICA: Oh honey, I'm so proud of you. (Monica gives Chandler a hug.)   
RACHEL: How about you two? (Looking at Ross and Joey, Joey is looking really sad.) What's wrong Joey? Didn't you do well?   
JOEY: I miss Heather. She was so cute, especially her smile.   
PHOEBE: Aww, Joey has a crush on his teacher.   
CHANDLER: What teacher? Heather was his practice baby.   
RACHEL: They actually trusted you guys with real babies?   
JOEY: Heather was my baby, we bonded! She's probably missing me right now! Maybe, I should call her.   
PHOEBE: You got her phone number? Isn't she kind of young to be writing? Let alone memorizing her phone number?   
JOEY: I snuck it off of their clipboard?   
CHANDLER: Joey, I don't think her parents would appreciate a strange man calling their daughter.   
JOEY: I'm not strange!   
CHANDLER: If you call her, you are! (Joey has this dejected look on his face.)   
RACHEL: And, what is your problem Ross?   
ROSS (defensively): I am, TOO, good at baby care! Look at Ben, he came out okay! In fact, he came out great! (The girls looks at Chandler for an explanation.)   
CHANDLER: He and the teachers had a few disagreements (Ross gives Chandler a dirty look) I don't think we should pursue it.   


* * *

SCENE Chandler and Monica's Bedroom - Chandler and Monica are in bed. He has his arm around her.   
CHANDLER: I'm so glad you made me go to that class. I'm not as scared anymore.   
MONICA: You were scared?   
CHANDLER: Of course, remember the action figure incident, and the time I lost Ben on the bus. I was terrified at the prospect of being left alone with our baby.   
MONICA: Oh honey, you should have told me. (pause) To be honest, I'm scared too! I don't know if I can be a good mother. (Monica turns around and look at Chandler.) What if our baby doesn't like me?   
CHANDLER: The baby will love you.   
MONICA: Remember Ben, he cried when he...   
CHANDLER: And he learn to love his Aunt Monica. Honey, you will be a great mother. (Chandler gives her a loving kiss on the forehead. Monica settle back down against Chandler.) By the way, the room looks great. I didn't know Phoebe and Rachel could paint so well.   
MONICA: Actually, they didn't.   
CHANDLER (concerned): You didn't?!   
MONICA: No, Gary and his roommate did it.   
CHANDLER: Who?   
MONICA: You know, "little drops of heaven".   
CHANDLER: You mean "hmmm, I would've remember you", Gary? (trying to sound like Gary)   
MONICA (proudly): Yep, I promised him and his roommate 3 boxes of candy.   
CHANDLER: All right! Those candies did come in handy.   
MONICA: And the guys are double dating with Rachel and Phoebe next Saturday. (Monica gets a startled look on her face and sit up.) Oh my!   
CHANDLER: Honey, what is it? You okay? (Monica takes Chandler's hand and place it on her stomach. Chandler has a puzzled look and then a wide grin spread across his face.) Is that a kick?   
MONICA: I think so, whoa she's active tonight!   
CHANDLER: He's having a one boy party in there. Whoa! That's my boy. (Monica gives him a look.) or girl. (Monica expression change to a humorous smile.)   
MONICA: I'm glad I'm having your baby.   
CHANDLER: That makes two of us. Wait, let's see how the baby feels (Chandler put his hand on Monica's tummy. He talks to her tummy.) Okay, one kick for no and two kicks for yes. (After a few second.) Daddy is waiting here! (a whole lot kicking later) I think six kicks is an enthusiastic thumbs up. 

**

THE END

**


End file.
